inspired by the challenging "This World: Duncan Bannatyne Takes on Tobacco" There's not enough choices, we think there's a gap So we'd like to offer the choice of breathing in crap We won't quite put it like that, to the young in our fold We'll spin it and turn it, make them think they're so bold
There's just not enough choice for the young at this time Sure there's tennis and swimming and mountains to climb There's bike riding, karate, dancing - jazz and tap But we feel there should be the choice of breathing in crap
That's what's missing in the world, from Mullumbimby to Mozambique And we think that we have a choice which is rather unique It's a choice you'll regret taking, and soon realise is no fun In fact you'll quickly discover that this choice is dumb
But then it's too late, ha ha you are trapped By this choice we generously offer of breathing in crap You're a poor child in Africa, like we care All you mean to us is that you'll make us millionaires